God is STILL good.

Up until about a month ago, I have had a pretty easy life. I have grown up in house with incredible parents who loved and supported me, i went to college, i have a job, etc. It is because of all of these things that I used to have a skewed view of my Heavenly Father. I used to think that something bad was just around the corner. My life was too good. Sure, I had endured small struggles but never had I experienced something that was life altering. To put it simply, I feared God and his wrath in an unhealthy way- not the respectful fear of the Lord spoken of in Scripture. I used to agonize over decisions fearing that God would punish me for making the wrong one. I was not living life under the freedom that Jesus offers when you accept him as Lord. 

As I struggled with this, the Lord drew me to Colossians 2:13-14 which says: 

"And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross."

After reading this verse, I was reminded that my punishment has been paid and fulfilled. I don't need to act like I am walking on eggshells afraid that my Father is waiting for me to mess up. The freedom that comes with knowing Jesus Christ comes with grace so that when I sin and mess up (which is inevitable), His grace covers me. When bad things happen, they are not my punishment for sin. They are God drawing me to himself and refining me for the purposes of His glory. Sometimes, I need to be disciplined just like when I was little and needed a spanking from my dad but when discipline comes, I don't need to be afraid of it. I say all of this because it is only God's timing that I was learning this before my dad passed away. 

If I had still been living under the fear of something bad happening, then my faith would have crumbled on May 15th. That type of faith was not based on the fact that Jesus died on the cross and rose again and is alive today. That faith would have said, no way God is good. He just let my perfectly healthy dad die. But thank the Lord that he was refining my faith before Dad was taken from us. It is because He brought me to this realization that I was able to say, "I still believe." This is not a punishment for my sins, it is God bringing glory to Himself. I was listening to a podcast yesterday of a man who had lost his son recently. When his wife called to tell him the bad news, his first words were, "Christ has risen from the dead and that is still true and God is still good." While I would like to say that those were my first words after my dad's Spirit went up to Heaven, that is however what I try to focus on now. My circumstances have changed, but God has not. He is STILL Sovereign, good, faithful, loving, merciful, etc. and I am so thankful I can count on Him. 

"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have HOPE: because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions NEVER fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."  Lamentations 3:21-23